Valentine's Day is a Scam

Yes, I said it. And I sell jewelry...which is a classic gift for Valentine's day.

But I haven't liked this "holiday" for years.

It's estimated that people spend ONE BILLION dollars on cards for Valentine's Day. Seriously? That's a LOT of money. Fancy manufactured cards gained popularity long ago - in the 1800s...from Wikipedia:

Paper Valentines became so popular in England in the early 19th century that they were assembled in factories. Fancy Valentines were made with real lace and ribbons, with paper lace introduced in the mid-19th century.^[50] The reinvention of Saint Valentine's Day in the 1840s has been traced by Leigh Eric Schmidt.^[51] As a writer in Graham's American Monthly observed in 1849, "Saint Valentine's Day... is becoming, nay it has become, a national holyday."^[52] In the United States, the first mass-produced valentines of embossed paper lace were produced and sold shortly after 1847 by Esther Howland (1828–1904) of Worcester, Massachusetts.^[53][54]

It wasn't until the 1980s when the diamond industry took notice of this "holiday" and started promoting their products as the must have item for true love.

I have come to really loathe this mass produced holiday. We are doing Valentine's day cards for the kids at Marshal's school today ... that is a tradition that I really did love as a kid in elementary school.

But as an adult, I've told my husband NOT to buy me anything. And I'm not just saying that...I mean it. He knows how serious I am too. I feel it's a made up holiday that consumers are sucked into and made to feel like they must spend their money...sometimes hundreds of dollars or more, in order to "prove" their love.

I had a wonderful coworker at my last job, who sadly has passed on at a much too young age, who I remember getting upset with her husband for getting her roses from Costco instead of a fancy delivery service. Seriously upset. Now, she was a wonderful person who I adored but she was nuts in this case. I would have been thrilled that my husband was so thrifty and logical. Although now I'd still be mad at the waste of money.

So, even though I make and sell jewelry in my Etsy shop, I have not actively promoted (other than a few passing mentions on Facebook) my jewelry as an option for Valentine's day.

If you enjoy and celebrate it, fabulous. We won't be joining you among the crowds at dinner nor will we be investing in cards or gifts for each other. We love each other every day and do various special things to show our love...we don't need a designated day...where florists raise their prices!

Best Intentions

One of my favorite blogs is Free Range Kids. Today's parents are so overly concerned about what their kids are doing every single second. I want my son to be independent and confident. I refuse to be a helicopter parent.

The Sunday before Thanksgiving my church had a wonderful brunch after service. The food was incredible. :)

Marshal loves church and I love how comfortable he is there. He rarely panics if he can't find me right away, but at three he has had his moments.

Well, on this particular Sunday we were all sitting at tables and eating (our church meets at a high school and we are in the common area) and Marshal wanted to go play. I told him that was just fine...go for it.

Dancing with my boy in public.

So he starts looking for another kid to play with and he wanders a ways off - but I could still see him. Then he gets to one of the double doors to go outside. I'm still watching him and I was absolutely fine with him venturing outside. Practically the whole wall is glass and I could easily see him if he was outside. He is a strong little kid and started pushing one of the doors open.

And an adult interferes and brings him back over to my table. I tell her it's okay...he can go outside if he wants. She looks a little surprised but accepted it just fine. This happened a couple of times with other adults.

So he continues to play and ends up outside with another little kid for a few minutes. It was pretty cold so they were going in and out. She ended up inside and he was on his way out again. He was doing just fine outside by himself...and I could SEE him.

Next thing I know he's under the arm of one of the older ladies. She actually PICKED him up and was carrying him over to our table to ask who's child he was. [I'm actually surprised he tolerated being picked up by a stranger.]

It was all I could do not to be sarcastic but I told her that I knew what he was doing and I was watching him and he had permission to go outside. She looked at me as though I had two heads, set him down, and walked off muttering.

Now, don't get me wrong, I'm glad that our church is so close and that people look out for each other and our kids. I just found it amusing. Yes, he's three and most of the other three year olds are right next to their parents. But I don't WANT him to be like other kids.

I want him to grow into a confident and independent adult. I wasn't letting him play in the road or anywhere near the road. There weren't huge crowds of people. I could still see him. He wasn't panicking. He was being an independent little boy.

I also let him climb and explore at the play ground on toys that are considered "unsafe" for his age. I figure if he has the confidence to do it I'm not going to stop him.

Going on the BIG slide at the fair. It was pretty scary but he did awesome.

Are We Creating Lazy Parents?

I admit, I'm not the world's best mother. I do my best but I have limits and have snapped at him when he didn't deserve it. I've left him alone to watch TV so I could have "me" time. I've fed him things that weren't very healthy (macaroni and cheese is a favorite meal!).

While he hasn't started school yet, and we're still debating on what direction his schooling will take, as I drove to work the other day I thought about the state of our schools. More specifically, the state of our parents.

At church we had a request from a teacher. She asked for us to donate granola bars and other non perishable food stuff for their elementary school classrooms. The reason? The population of kids there is more transient than most and they do not have a lot of parental participation.

How sad is that? Just because you move around a lot you aren't going to participate in your child's education? And why is that? Do these parents think that it's the schools job to feed as well as educate their kids?

Schools now a days provide breakfasts, lunches, and sometimes even dinners. Why???

I can totally understand if people are super, super poor and can't afford fancy foods. But if you are that poor there is state assistance - food stamps, welfare, etc. There's really no excuse for any child to go to school without a peanut butter sandwich at a minimum. Or a cheese sandwich. Something.

Are parents who can provide simply defaulting to the schools to take over their parenting responsibilities?

I donated several bags of granola bars - because it's not the kids' faults that their parents aren't participating. But then we are passing on that message to kids - don't have personal responsibility because the government will take care of you no matter what.

And I find that sad.

This is News? Men and Women are...DIFFERENT!

I've always been fascinated by some people's stubborn determination to believe that men and women are identical...the same...interchangeable.

I realize the whole women's liberation movement wanted to even the playing field for women, and I'm pretty sure it succeeded...and then some.

But the idea that men and women are exactly the same...can do all the same things...is illogical.

Sure there are some women outside the norm who can bench press a cow - but they are few and far between. There are some men who prefer designing jewelry or their favorite color is pink. But again, they aren't going to be considered the norm for men.

You can call it sexist...I call it logic. And some people call it science!

""As with other senses, such as hearing and the olfactory system, there are marked sex differences in vision between men and women. "

It makes sense. We are created by a wonderful God who designed us specifically to be together - man and woman. We're made differently but we work together. Like two puzzle pieces.

Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh. Gen. 2:24

We aren't meant to be the same. How boring if men and women were all the same!

Yes, there will always be those on the outer edges of the standard deviation. It doesn't make them evil or bad or weird. It also doesn't mean that we should revamp our entire society to make abnormal the new normal.

Kids Need Their Daddies

Okay, before I move on...I realize that there are wonderful single mothers out there who do their best and raise wonderful kids. This is not a dig on single mothers or looking down on any woman trying to do their best to raise a well adjusted kid. I think my mom did a pretty good job raising me and my brother. :)

This is about the value of dads. Because as much as our society tries to put dads down and make them seem like baboons who aren't necessary, good dads ARE important.

My father died when I was 8 and I can assure you I am not better off without him...nor was my little brother. We both could have sorely used his guidance as we grew up...and I certainly needed his influence when it came to boys in my life as a young girl.

This article brought tears to my eyes.

"Not one of the men I knew as a child would consider raising a hand to a woman. A man who would hit a woman was a coward, not a man, a nothing, in their eyes. Any man stupid enough to do a thing like that was very likely to have the other men thereabouts take them out some night and “knock some sense into him.”

It never entered my mind to be afraid of anything when I was little. Whatever bad was out there, I believed my daddy would make sure it never touched me. I can not remember a time when he didn’t seem as big and safe as a fort."

My daddy taught me to fish...how to be independent. I was a "tom boy" who loved playing with boy cousins and having slug fights. Of course, he only had eight years with me before he passed away from cancer. Even in those short eight years he had a significant impact on my life...so imagine if he'd lived!

Are Kids Too Spoiled?

Am I the only mom who worries that she's spoiling her kid? I hope not. And I don't generally feel like my kid is a spoiled brat. He's not once thrown a tantrum in a store when I've said no to a toy or treat...I figure that's pretty good for an almost three year old.

But his room is overflowing with toys. And clothes. This kid dresses better than I do. And I'm sure we give him more leeway than kids got 50 years ago. Talking back was not tolerated by my grandfather. Marshal talk back to us often...usually not about important stuff.

Yes, we spank. I admit it and I'm not ashamed of it. Everything in moderation. Quite frankly, we haven't had to spank him very much. It was mostly when he didn't understand time outs and was getting into something dangerous (i.e. sticking his finger in an electrical outlet). Now he HATES being sent to his room and it's a much more effective punishment for him. But he still gets swats when he's particularly defiant.

This is an interesting article.

The saying-no and limit-setting challenges for parents of young children often revolve around food, sleep and media. “By setting limits, we’re teaching them what our values are and the way we think they can lead a happier, productive life,” Dr. High said.

It's so easy to want to make Marshal happy by giving him things or letting him do whatever he wants...and trust me we've fallen so many times. I think he is learning limits and boundaries and we do say no when we need to. But that smile is hard to resist!

I think kids can be too spoiled in ways that previous generations (like my grandparents) wouldn't have considered. Kids take up their parents time like never before. Our lives revolve around our kids. My grandparents certainly didn't rearrange their schedules for their kids. They were supportive parents but they were also busy running their own lives. Did kids have more freedom to just be?

Now we book them into all kinds of activities and events. I hope that I can resist the temptation to keep Marshal busy all the time...but balance that with not letting him get too bored that he wants to start trouble. :)

Pit Bulls - America's Sweethearts

Apparently, "Pit Bulls" (which is a ubiquitous term for many different dogs) used to be a very popular breed in America. 

"During the first half of the 20th century, Pit Bulls were the closest thing the United States had to a national dog.  They were featured on U.S. recruiting posters in World Wars I and II, prominently featured as corporate mascots and cast as the ideal family dog in television and movies."

I have yet to meet a "mean" Pit Bull but I admit I'm very cautious around them. And I would be very nervous for Marshal to be around one...even if I knew them well.

Even though I know in my head that a Pit is no more vicious as a breed than Huskies (who CAN be mean if not raised properly), I've obviously been affected by the media's portrayal (my entire life) of Pits as scary, aggressive, dangerous dogs.

Any dog can be dangerous. If you don't train and exercise a Siberian Husky, they can be incredibly damaging and potentially aggressive...and Huskies have VERY powerful jaws. Maybe not as powerful as Pit but strong enough to snap bones.

I would love to adopt a Pit, but honestly I don't know that I'd ever be able to get myself to relax. The potential for all that power to turn and bite scares me for my son. It's not logical and it isn't even a fear shown true by statistics. But it's still a fear I have.

If we didn't have Marshal, or if he were older, I think I'd be more okay with it. And if we raised one from a puppy it would make me feel better too.

Is Single Motherhood Something to be Celebrated?

We all grow up in different situations. My father died when I was eight and my then single mom raised my brother and I...she never dated. Not once. I've never seen her date anyone - even after we both left the house.

She worked full time as far as I can remember - except she was generally able to work her schedule around our school and sports. She is a highly educated woman who has worked as a Registered Nurse since before I was born.

Mommy and Me.

It still wasn't easy for her though and both my brother and I recognize the void that having our father die left in our lives.

Daddy's Girl

Some people want to redefine what "normal" is and what, to me, is the logical definition of a family...having two parents (a father and a mother) will always be the best situation for kids. Did that definition make my own non-normal family bad or strange? Of course not.

Obviously there are going to be situations when a mother and a father are horrible parents and the kids are better off with someone other than their own biological parents (one of my friends is fostering kids in this situation...the poor little girl would scoop out her poopy diaper...because she didn't know an adult would change her...think about that for a second).

But if all things are equal, I believe a mom and a dad are going to be the healthiest situation for kids. Moms bring special things to kids...I know when Marshal falls he ALWAYS wants his mommy. Even though I'm not the most nurturing or sympathetic (sometimes I tell him to suck it up) he still wants the "mommy" touch instead of daddy. Other times, he needs his father much more than mommy.

Having a father is still important, no matter what people try to say otherwise. I know bashing guys is all the rage and I've found myself falling into that trap. Making jokes about dumb guys is PC, but a guy makes a crack about a dumb woman and heads will roll. Apparently, all guys are good for is money...

"Young men need jobs so they can pay child support ..."

Say what?

Not a perfect family. Not even a remotely "normal" family.

As the child of a single mother, I do think that society is worse off if we encourage single mother hood as something normal and okay. Kids need stability - not rotating "father" figures as this particular woman seems to insinuate is okay.

In fact women move in and out of singleness, married parents break apart, men and women live together without marrying, spouses or partners die, romantic attachments form and dissolve. 

We just seem to be desperately trying to establish a non-normal as normal in society and I find it kind of disturbing.

And the phrase "Me thinks thou dost protest too much" also comes to mind. It's good to read I'm not the only one who finds the article in defense of single mother hood slightly disturbing.

How Protective Is Too Protective?

My mom was very protective as I was growing up. I was the oldest, so she was worse with me than with my younger brother. I always thought she was over the top, but looking back she wasn't nearly as protective as I remember...and I had quite a bit of room to get in trouble.

I wasn't allowed to spend the night at most of my friends' homes (except for one rare exception where she knew the mom really well and neither of us girls had fathers). She finally let me ride the city bus to the mall when I was 13 or 14 but she drove behind it and followed us.

I got in enough trouble during my middle school years that she made me go to the neighbor baby sitter's for at least an hour after school and even had to check in at the neighbor's as a high school kid. Oops.

But we were allowed to walk several blocks to the store, crossing two very busy two lane roads. I even walked to and from middle school, which was a couple of miles on a very, very busy road with no side walk! Looking back I can't believe she allowed it.

So now I'm a mom and thinking about all the horrors that could befall upon my little sweetheart and wondering how my mom could have been so lenient with me!!! LOL

The sane side of me wonders how we will raise strong, independent, grown ups if we don't let them have the freedom kids once had ... eons ago.

Look at this comparison of how far kids were allowed to wander way back when compared to today...

Will I let Marshal go more than 300 yards down the street? Well, we don't right now obviously...he's not even 3! But when he's 7 or 8?

Yes there are many dangers out there...cars could run him over; perverts could steal him away; he could fall out of a tree...and as a mom my natural instinct is to try to protect him.

However...I can't exactly wrap him up in bubble wrap and stuff him in a closet to keep him safe. It's a fine line between protection and allowing kids to grow up. Hopefully we will be moved to our property (6 acres) before he's of an age to explore so that he will have the room to do so without having to worry about traffic or tons of strangers. Then I can just worry about him getting poked in the eye with a stick or falling out of a tree.

Where Did the Half Gallons Go?

Remember when you could buy half a gallon of ice cream?

Now...it's 1.5 qts. And yet, somehow, the price hasn't changed.

Turns out, it's not just the ice cream.

Don't be fooled into thinking that inflation isn't affecting you, because it is...it's just subtle and sneakier.

Free Speech for Thee but not for Chick Fil A

I don't watch much news...it's all very depressing. So I didn't see the story about Chick Fil-A until someone posted about it on Facebook. Goes to show how addicted to Facebook I am, but that's another issue.

After hearing what the owner of this business actually said, I think this is a manufactured "issue"...and it shouldn't even be an issue in this day and age. Do people really think there are no Gay people working at Chick-Fil-A. They don't refuse service to people who are gay. They operate their business within the laws of our country.

And yet a few vocal radicals have taken the Chick Fil-A's owner's statements and blown them widely out of proportion - accusing him of being homophobic and bigoted and anti-gay marriage. None of those things appear to be true based on his statements.

He said he supported the biblical view of marriage.

OH GOOD LORD someone call the nightly news and report an outrageous opinion. Really? The definition of marriage as a man and a woman is somehow a radical, bigoted opinion? Where am I living? Mars?

I guess I thought we still lived in the United States where we had something called the First Amendment. That a government entity is now punishing a business and individual based on their speech is blatantly illegal, but that doesn't seem to stop them. Nor do they acknowledge their hypocrisy.

The owners of Amazon just donated millions towards the Gay Marriage campaign in Washington State. I don't plan on boycotting Amazon anytime soon.

This (gay) gentleman seems to have the right attitude.

If you have a different opinion that is great. What a boring world this would be if we all thought exactly the same. Yet, if you do think differently than the "approved" meme then you are ostracized, or worse. It's really pathetic and I refuse to change my beliefs just because they are unpopular with some.

I wish we had a Chick-Fil-A in our area...I'd offer them my business in a heart beat.

I'm Not Reading It Either

And by "it" I mean Fifty Shades of Grey, the most talked about book out there right now.

This post explains it better than I ever could, but I also have personal reasons why I won't read it. I started reading "Romance" novels while still in elementary school...forth or fifth grade. I was an above average reader and my friend was reading them too. Johanna Lindsey was a favorite for us.

Did I know the first thing about sex? Nope. Did I really "learn" anything about sex from these books? Not really. I don't really think I understood them that fully but they did leave a mark on me and my future. I learned that (gorgeous) men are supposed to rescue a woman and women are supposed to be hard headed, stubborn, or helpless and conniving. I learned that a woman can change that "bad boy" if she is attractive enough and "puts out" to make the man fall in love.

Romance novels create unrealistic expectations. I fought this reality for decades. Even now I find myself wanting to read them but I do my best to resist and avoid books in this genre. Why?

Those unrealistic expectations set every single man who I've ever been romantically inclined up for failure. NO one person could ever meet the expectations set by the men in those books. The books are no better than pornography, which also sets up unrealistic expectations.

Again, those expectations destroy relationships. And I can certainly say they hurt mine, including my marriage to my wonderful husband.

The things that I let into my mind affect me greatly...whether I see them on TV or read them in a book. Is everyone this affected by what they view? Probably not. But I bet enough people are that more should be conscious about what they allow in their lives.

The blog above has some great reasons for not reading this book and from my perspective, none of them were "judgmental" toward those who have read or plan to read the books.

Her main reasons are:

• Reason #1: Let’s start with the facts. Fifty Shades of Grey is classified as erotic fiction.
• Reason #2: The Bible has said for thousands of years that lust is hurtful and harmful. Guess what? Biopsychologists and others are studying the effects of lust, pornography, and erotica on the brain and the body. They are finding that the Bible was, in fact, right.
• Reason #3: Okay, we’re girls. And, sadly, a few of our guys have looked at porn. How’d that work for ya? How’d it make you feel? Did it cross your mind that you could never compare to the perfection created by lights, camera, and Photoshop? Well, he can’t compare to a plasticized, vanilla interpretation of manhood either.
• Reason #4: Do you know what BDSM is? Bondage, dominance, sadism, and masochism. If you don’t know what those words mean, be glad. If you do know, you should understand that the most damaging part of Fifty Shades of Grey is that God created sex to be a partnership that’s fueled by love and self-giving, not pain and humiliation.

Go read her whole post to see her reasons expanded.

I found her comment section interesting because there were many who called her judgmental. I don't presume to judge your heart. Only God can do that. And if reading this kind of book doesn't affect you then it is not up to me to tell you that you shouldn't.

For me, I know that if I read these books I would regret it. It might be a wonderful love story...but the imagery it includes is not something I want forever in my mind.

Marriage Survives

Generally when I hear someone say they don't "believe" in marriage or don't care if they co-habitate their biggest argument is that marriage is dead...the divorce rate is 50%.

Well...they are wrong. Statistics actually show that for women under 50 the divorce rate has decreased (from 1996 to 2009). I find it interesting that the rate for women over 50 has gone up...is that because of the feminist movement?

Stats aren't perfect but when the statistics are this consistent it's clear that the meme of 50 percent divorce is just flat false.

I like this article's take on why the myth of 50% divorce is perpetuated.

"Maybe those in the media and entertainment industry lie in order to feel better about their own shortcomings. Ironically enough, the one place where a fifty percent divorce rate is likely accurate, would be in the media/entertainment industry itself. It must be a hard place to be, realizing that failure isn’t the norm except for when applied to your own sad, empty little lives."

Read more: http://www.foxnews.com/opinion/2012/07/01/liberals-need-to-stop-lying-about-divorce/#ixzz1zWdhRmya

If one hears a lie often enough it starts to sound plausible. Maybe Hollywood is just jealous that most of the rest of us work hard and stick with our marriages. No offense to Tom and Kate. 

Marriage is alive and well. It's a difficult institution but well worth it. 

Where Did All the Grownups Go?

Is it just me, or are twenty somethings really pathetic now-a-days? And not all of them, obviously, because my two little cousins are entirely responsible in their early twenties, both now married, one pregnant and a special ed teacher, the other married and manager at a coffee shop.

But this just strikes me as pathetic.

I am turning 22 and I have no idea what to do. I am living at home with my parents and four younger siblings. I am unemployed and have only worked a few odd jobs since high school. I have taken a few courses at my local university but do not have a degree, let alone any idea what to get a degree in. I was never able to decide if there was any point in going back to school without a real focus.

And I can't imagine this guy is the only 20-something with these same feelings. How did we get here?

At 22 I was dating my now husband, working at a Fortune 500 company, and paying my own way through college - "attending" classes virtually on nights and weekends. I didn't necessarily know what I wanted to do professionally, but I knew my calling was to get a degree and I've always loved school.

The idea of living at home with my mom was horrifying, though I did do a few week stink between moving out of my apartment and getting married and buying our own home. It was rough and both my mom and I couldn't wait for me to move back out.

If my son acts like this when he's 22 I am not sure how I'll be able to be a "good" mom. My instinct is to tell this loser to man up and get over it. What does he expect? For wealth to just be handed over to him without having to work? But then I re-read his letter and he really does seem to be clueless as to how to change.

Have we so pampered our children that they are going through mid life crisis before they're even a quarter of a century old? My grandpa was married and in the military during WWII by the age of 22. And I'm pretty sure they had kids soon thereafter. At age 18 you were considered a man. At that age you either went into college, more likely, you joined the military and got training for a real profession.

My grandfather never went to college. He sucked at school. And yet he ran his own business...two of them actually...successfully. Where has that individual sense of entrepreneurship gone?

Don't Blame Disney

I read an interesting post the other day, where the author blames Disney movies, and other Hollywood dramas, for us gal's unrealistic expectations for relationships.

" As a little girl grows up, she hears story after story about how she needs to be saved by the prince on the white horse or knight in shining armor. These stories unknowingly paint a picture that in order for a woman to live happily ever, after she needs a man to rescue and save her. She learns that her ultimate life happiness depends on a male hero."

After thinking about it though, there's several movies I watched as a girl where the female character wasn't so much "saved" by the male as the other way around.

Take Beauty and the Beast. Who saved who? She went by herself to search for her father, found a scary beast in a haunted castle, and made the decision to sacrifice herself to save her father. The Beast was certainly not perfect, nor handsome.

Now when it comes to Snow White I can see where being saved required a handsome prince. But with Cinderella I think there was a little more to it. I've been reading Cinderella to Marshal every night...sometimes twice. It's currently his favorite book.

She is a strong woman. The invite comes from the castle, and despite her cruel step family, she decides she will go too. She has a fairy Godmother...not a man...who helps get her there. And then defies her step mother to make sure she gets her true love.

I get the article's point though. Women do have unrealistic expectations of what Happily Ever After really is. But I don't think we should just blame Disney. I love Disney movies.

One part of her article I definitely agree with...

Many little girls grow up and dream of finding their prince. They grow up dreaming about being the princess and wearing the white dress. Years are spent focusing on the fantasy of the wedding day and what it will be like. For many, that day comes and once it is over they realize that true love and having a successful relationship is much more than they realized.

Focusing on that ONE day is short sighted and naive. It's a great day. A fun day. But ultimately just one day. The idea that people spend tens of thousands of dollars on that day boggles my mind.

Elementary School Graduations are Stupid

And when Marshal is in Elementary school I will tell him so and might even refuse to attend if they make a big deal out of it.

Since when is graduating from Kindergarten a big deal? I don't recall ever having a party for moving up a grade. We had a kind of 6th grade graduation, but it wasn't super fancy. I remember riding away from the Elementary school on my last day feeling a little sad...but at the same time excited because I was moving on to Middle School.

In middle school we got to go to Wild Waves Theme Park for our 8th grade "graduation"...but there was no ceremony, caps, or weird ceremonies.

And now schools are throwing celebrations for the start of school.

I'm sorry (not really) but that is just stupid. What a waste of time and money. School is about learning. If my property taxes are paying for this kind of useless crap no wonder our schools are turning out sub par citizens who think they deserve everything handed to them on a platter.

Students are treated as if they are kings and queens who deserve the world. Reality could not be further from their school experiences.

I'm not saying to beat kids down and drum misery into them...but reality is not all lollipops and roses. Life is difficult and only those with a HEALTHY self esteem, not over inflated and self aggrandizing, will be successful.

On my way to work every day I see an elementary school electronic sign that says "Every child is capable of Success" or something of the sort. I disagree. Not every human is going to be "successful" (and who's definition of success are they using?). It's just part of the human experience. People fail. Failure is not a bad thing. It teaches us.

Didn't Thomas Edison "Fail" 9,999 times before succeeding in making the lightbulb? Why should we be taking those failures away from our kids?

I hope I can be strong enough for my little man to allow him to fail.

Measles Making a Comback

Another reason why I lean toward having Marshal get all his vaccines. I don't want HIM getting the measles and I want that herd immunity to stay up.

His two year appointment is coming up and he'll be getting more shots. He starts crying just going in to the clinic building now. Poor kid. But I'd rather he cried for getting a shot than suffered the horrible consequence of a disease like Measles or Whooping Cough.

Is it selfish that some parents decide to not vaccinate? It seems like they figure, "well, I won't get my kids vaccinated just in case there is some sort of weird reaction but my kids won't get sick because everyone else will get vaccinated." Perhaps that's not the logic but it sure seems like it.

There are risks to everything in life. There are risks just getting out of bed in the morning. Vaccines in some cases can cause reactions and I'm sure there have been cases of children dying. But how many MORE children will die because parents are not vaccinating?

In my mind, the risk of vaccinating does not out way the risk of Marshal catching a horrible disease.

To Vaccinate or Not to Vaccinate - Is there Really a Question?

There was a point in time where I would not have even thought twice about having my son vaccinated...but that was when I didn't even have a kid and there was no big hype about vaccines causing all sorts of harm. 

I've been vaccinated with all my shots since I was a kid...my mom is a nurse and even today insists I get the flu shot. This one I ignored until I had a baby. 

I admit, the hype about the dangers of vaccines did cause me to hesitate before having Marshal vaccinated. I spoke with my mom and my doctor and came to the decision that the risks of NOT being vaccinated far outweigh the risks of the shots themselves. 

Bacterial meningitis is a condition that causes membranes in the brain and spinal cord to become inflamed. The disease can be deadly, or result in hearing loss, brain damage and learning disabilities. Pneumococcal meningitis is the most common and severe form of bacterial meningitis. It is estimated that about 25 to 30 percent of people die from the disease.

I am not comfortable risking my baby's life on the off chance he'll be one who has an allergic reaction or any sort of complication from a vaccine. My family has no history of vaccine reactions, nor is his immune system compromised. He's a strong, healthy little boy who has so far had all his shots without a single reaction, other than being tired from crying.

The myth of vaccines causing Autism has been debunked time and time again, and the man responsible for the false study was thoroughly discredited. 

I'm sure there are kids out there for who having a vaccine shot is more dangerous, and in those rare cases I can understand parents leaning towards not vaccinating. But for those of us who have children with healthy dispositions, getting vaccinated is simply logical. 

However, I don't think they should be mandatory. I still believe in individual rights and that includes the right of parents to make decisions I disagree with, or decisions that could possibly harm my family. That's just the way this country is built. The moment the government mandates a vaccine I'll be saying No Thanks.

Oh Now it's Minor-Attracted Person

Political correctness has sunk to a new low.

"Minor Attracted Person" is apparently the PC term for sicko Pedophiles.

I'm just sick to my stomach. DISGUSTING!

Anyone who is "attracted" to a child needs to be locked away. Simple as that. You come NEAR my son and claws, fangs, and guns come out.

I cannot believe this.

Oh, but I guess I'm just a cold hearted b***h who doesn't "understand" or have "compassion" for "minor attracted people".

O.M.G.

What ever happened to RIGHT and WRONG? What happened to the line where something is evil versus not? It keeps getting more and more blurred and it is pissing me off.